By Terri, Pooler, GA USASix days ago I lost my son, Seymour Shane. This is Seymour's Story:
PROM at 18 weeks + 4 days. Delivery at 20 weeks + 5 days.
Story added: 2008-01-28
I am 34 years old, married for 10 years and my husband and I have 3 boys. We had waited 4 years since our last child to try to get pregnant again because I had just finished college and we had just moved to a new state. We were pregnant on our first try (which has happened every time for us). I was due June 4th, 2008.
The pregnancy was absolutely normal. No bleeding, no cramping, no leaking, no sickness, nothing. I have gone full term with my other three boys and my water had to be broken during induced labor with each. I have never miscarried. So on January 7th, we were in complete disbelief when things started to go wrong.
I was home cooking supper when I felt a pressure like I was about to pass blood clot. I went into the bathroom to find a large red buldge coming out of my vagina (no one, to this day, quite knows what it was - possibly my sac). We rushed to the hospital with the 3 boys.
At the hospital, the "buldge" was no longer present, but my underwear were damp and tested positive for amniotic fluid. We were devestated until we saw the ultrasound which showed plenty of fluid and a healthy heartbeat. We also found out and that moment that we were having our 4th boy.
The doctor admitted me, put me in the upside down position and started antibiotics. About an hour later I had a huge gush. Next ultrasound showed almost no fluid. The doctor told us to prepare for losing the baby. We went through 2 days of torture just waiting for "it" to happen.
In the meantime, my husband and best friend found this website and printed out the "green" stories for me. I started to gain hope again. Everyday we saw our little boy moving around on the ultrasound and every four hours we heard his strong little heartbeat on the monitor.
After one week passed, I truly started to believe we were going to be a green story too. After two weeks passed, I was absolutely positive everything was going to be okay. The baby was doing great, I showed no signs of infection or labour and even my doctor started to become hopeful. It was going to be a long, hard road, but I was prepared.
Sadly, on the fifteenth day in the hospital, the ultrasound showed no heartbeat. It had been there only hours before and then it was gone. The doctor wanted to immediately induce because my blood count now showed an infection (there had been none before), but before he could even start pitocin, my body contracted and my little boy was born. He was 14.6 ounces and 12" long. He was absolutley perfect. We got to hold him and our boys got to hold him as well. Letting go of him was the worst moment of my life even though he was already gone.
As I said, this was only 6 days ago and right now I feel as though I can not ever go on. I have never felt a pain like this in my life. I loved Seymour as much as I love my other three boys and I will never forget him. We had a funeral two days ago and his burial is tomorrow. I am thankful for the pictures we took and the footprints and momentos the hospital gave me. I don't know that this story will help anyone, but I guess it feels theraputic to me.
I hope that someday I can be the super mom and wife that I once was, but right now I am empty. My deepest sympathy goes out to anyone else in this situation. I greive for you and with you.
Terri